Happiness is one big word. And no, not because I couldn’t spell this word in the first grade, but because it’s one of the first things we know when we’re born. Like, come on, have you ever felt effortless joy just seeing a baby laugh? Because I have.
People usually seek happiness because it makes them feel, well, happy. And happiness is one of those feelings that you can’t really explain. You just feel warm and good all over and you just appreciate everything that has happened in your life.
But it’s not easy always trying to pursue happiness in your life. There will be so many moments in your life where you feel like you’re at your lowest point and that nothing is going right, and there will be many people that make us feel unhappy. There will be so many struggles in our lives that can get on the way of being happy. But as time goes by, we build ourselves up, learn more about ourselves, learn more about our lives, and build up our happiness.
This last year was the most challenging year for me because I wasn’t happy for a lot of it. I was my own worst enemy. I kept bringing myself down for no reason. I let myself believe that other people would make me happy. I never focused on how I genuinely felt, I just thought about how I could never be happy. I hit my lowest point in my history of low points, but self-reflection really helped because it helped me find out what I was doing wrong.
Happiness really doesn’t come easy. And this past year, I learned a lot about it. With that in mind, here are a few tips that might help you on your journey to happiness! They have definitely helped me!
#1 Don’t Focus on the Negative Aspects of Your Life
There are bound to be so many moments in our lives where we feel down in the dumps. Personally, when I feel negativity creeping into my life, it’s all I can focus on. It keeps me from trying to do daily functions normally because I don’t feel like doing anything besides moping around and complaining about my negativity. So first, accept the fact that you are sad, angry, jealous, frustrated, or whatever it is! Then, pinpoint what made you feel this way and try to manage your emotions in your own healthy way (such as talking it out with a close friend, journaling, drawing, going for a run, etc.). And most importantly, remind yourself that this emotion won’t last forever! Everything gets better with time and this emotion will be over in no time.
#2 Don’t Rely on Others to Make You Happy
We all feel happiness from different things, and for me, I feel immense joy when I get the opportunity to see and hang out with my friends (sometimes all day). But happiness doesn’t sprout from other people because, well, it’s your >own happiness. If you always rely on others to make you feel happy, then when you’re alone, how do you feel happiness? I always forget that I don’t need to be outside and with my friends to feel joy. I can always just hang around and chill by myself, and you should know this too!
#3 Appreciate Everything Around You
Sometimes, I find myself thinking about the things that I want and don’t have. I end up on several different websites searching for various clothing items I want and even reading millions (or at least it feels like that many) of reviews on random products. But I always forget that I already have what I need and that I should appreciate the things I have. Beyond that, I often take my friends and family for granted, and knowing that I’m going to be away from my friends and family in about a month (when I go off to college) makes me realize how much I’ve taken them for granted. Appreciate the things around you because who knows when those things will be out of your life. Everything we have holds value to us, even if it isn’t always apparent, so appreciate those around you while you can and don’t forget to appreciate yourself as well!
#4 Reflect on Yourself Whenever You Can
Self-reflection really helped me notice whether or not I was doing something harmful to my own mental health. In my last post, I spoke about experiencing an unhealthy relationship and how toxic it can be. In my experience, I kept going back and thinking that the relationship would change and get better, but in the end, I had to get that stress out of my life. If I hadn’t reflected on myself, I wouldn’t have realized how detrimental the whole relationship was for my overall well-being. Self-reflection also allowed me to learn more about myself and make wiser decisions based on my prior actions. It also made me realize how unhappy I was by trying to make everyone else happy when I wasn’t even happy myself. By self-reflecting, you can assess your own actions and eventually change them. Hopefully, you can take some time to reflect on yourself and become more self-aware!
#5 Practice Putting Yourself First
If you don’t know me by now, I’m all about pushing forward and putting yourself first! And I think I’ve repeated myself tons of times already here, but, again, it is important to make your decisions based on putting yourself first. Take care of yourself, love yourself, and trust yourself. You are in control of your own life, so do what makes you happy. And once you start putting yourself first, you’ll end up learning so many valuable lessons along the way. Not only did I learn to accept that I have faults in this process, but I also learned to love myself with those faults. This helped me improve my relationships by realizing that everyone has their own faults, as well as good points, and to accept them as they are. And by living this way, I feel like I am changing to be a better person.
And don’t forget that putting yourself first doesn’t mean that you’re ignoring others because you need to take care of yourself first before you can take care of others! Why else do flight attendants tell you to put on your oxygen mask first before helping others? Because you need to be sure that you are okay in order to help out other people!
So those are my five tips on how to be happy! I hope they will make your journey for the pursuit of happiness easier. See you guys in my next post!